Yearning...This story is true.
She slipped into dreaming quickly... like a deep love or a coma. Her night had gone from mundane life to reading about Navajo witchcraft to this... these odd murmurings of the mind.
It started in the way most dreams do - about things related to the day that had just recently faded from being. She dreamt of a pool, of M and C, of trying to find a shadow doll amongst a room of useless objects. Floating duck advertisements, frog shadows, outlines of women doing breaststroke. It was all again beyond her grasp; she would never find what she needed not because of her own failure, but because it was not there to be found.
The dream transitioned as dreams do, with no sense. She found herself driving down a dead-end street to meet a friend she had talked to that same day. She was doing a favor for K and her two children who she desperately wanted to look up to her as a big sister. She walked, talked, went too far and found two cars where she thought she had parked, unable to
it's now or never...it'll be okay child.. i promise you that.
just hold on a little longer, let it seep away.
keep your heart strong while you cry;
hold on to those dreams before they slip,
slip so far away.
now's the test, now's to see
if you can come out of this & smile.
so set aside your insecurities, babe,
because it's now or never.
it's now or never.
letter to himHow do you say everything & nothing at once?
How do you communicate your entirety without uttering a word?
It's slowly, softly that it seems to seep from me to you...
In this silence we find everything. & we lose everything at the same time.
Because this empty space is full of emotion, full of thoughts.
Empty yet full... volatile... waiting for a chance to erupt into it.
It's in the eyes, baby. It's in your eyes that I find that silence says more than words.
It's with my eyes that I talk without speaking, sing without making a sound.
Blinking quickly to avoid the sting, squeezing lids together tightly to keep in what's found.
It's without saying a word that I seem to feel you now...
That's why I sit there, staring longingly.
That's why sometimes you look at me & say "What?"
& I just smile & reply "Nothing."
Because I find the world in your eyes.
& there aren't words to explain it.
There never were & there never will be.
There never should be, because they could never capture it...